Dear Women, Shall We Stop Obsessing About Having Flat Abs?

Fat on a female belly is natural and healthy — let’s stop demonizing it.

If you’ve ever shamed yourself for the fat around your belly, I feel you. But you don’t have to do this anymore. Photo by Andres Ayrton from Pexels

I’ve never worried much about my boobs, ass, or legs. They’re certainly not “perfect” by the common beauty standards, but I like them anyway.

But my belly — that’s a different story. I’ve probably been sucking it in most of my waking hours since the age of 12. I’m more self-conscious about this part of my body than any other.

Of course, I have better and worse days. On good days, I look in the mirror and agree to the layer of fat around my waist. I say to myself my belly is still within the “acceptable” range.

But on my bad days? I can criticize myself for it for hours on end. Whenever I walk by a shop window on the street, I automatically look at the reflection to check how much it’s sticking out. And what I see is that it’s sticking out way too much.

That’s where the cycle of self-shaming starts and I feel like I’ve failed. I’ve failed to have “flat abs” that — as commonly accepted — is the sign of fitness, health, and vitality. I then extend that sense of failure to other areas of my life. The size of my belly serves as a confirmation I’m just not good enough.